Saturday, April 16, 2011

The Quarter Jars-Our Chore System


If you're like me, you struggle with keeping your house in order and clean, the kids on task to help, and most importantly, doing it all with the right attitude.

Teaching our kids how to take care of their things (and our things) is part of growing up and learning stewardship. Are you being intentional in how you go about teaching that? One day after getting on my kids for all the things they weren't doing to help me around the house, I had to admit that I hadn't been very intentional about training them to do it. I had taught them how to clean and put away, but I wasn't encouraging them in it. I expected them to see all the things around the house that needed to get done, and do it. I also expected them to do it with very little encouragement or reward. Here are a few tips I've learned and have helped us work towards a system of taking care of the house TOGETHER!

Have a plan
If I fail to implement a plan, I am planning to fail. Most children don't naturally want to do chores. They usually don't volunteer to help around the house. And they most certainly don't "see" all that needs to get done the way mom does. So we must teach them. As my kids have gotten bigger, I've started a few different chore systems. If the system is cumbersome to establish or to follow through on, or if it is overly dependent on me to work, it will quickly be abandonned. Often, we will start out strong, and then I'll forget to put the stickers on the chart, or calculate how much they've done and what I owe them, or fill out the next week's list of to-do items. And before you know it, we're essentially living like we don't have a system.

Let them be a part in establishing the system

My kids will be much more enthusiastic about our new chore system, if there is a craft involved. So, I bought 4 jars at Hobby Lobby for $1 each. I let the kids pick out their own wooden decoration and we decorated our jars with stickers and paint. I also bought a bag of pre-colored wooden blocks for about $3. These jars were going to help us keep track of work accomplished.

If they are old enough, let them keep track of their progress


It's not my job to keep track of what they've done or haven't done. With 4 kids to keep up with, I can't use up valuable brain cells on this! With our system, every time they do a chore it is their responsibility to come and add a wooden block from my jar into theirs. Every block is worth $.25. Chores that are more difficult can be worth more blocks.

Establish what the daily chores are that need to be done for each child There are certain things that need to be done everyday, and that changes based on the age of the child. For us right now, that includes making the bed, brushing teeth, getting dressed, keeping their rooms clean, putting away their laundry, doing their own dishes and helping keep toys picked up. Those things are expected. We've determined that all those things are worth a quarter every day. Those chores need to be done without my reminding and in a timely manner.

Reward them for taking initative
When they choose to do a chore (without my asking) they can earn extra blocks. It's been amazing to me to observe this. If they know there is a reward (a quarter) waiting for them, they miraculously know that the dishes need to be washed after every meal, or that the dog poop needs to be picked up. I realize that life doesn't always reward us moms for every time we take care of something that needs to be taken care of. However, that responsiblility has to be learned some time. Why not encourage it at young age? It's a whole lot better than the alternative: frustrated mommy yelling at her kids for not helping out more around the house.

Involve the little ones
If you have younger kids too, involve them. Kids as little as 3 can help pick up toys, organize the silverware drawer, wipe the counter off. Our 3 year old loves doing something just like her big brother and sister. She loves to put a block in her jar for helping mom. Earning quarters isn't quite on her radar yet, but she does love an occassional trip to the dollar bins at Target!

Delegate!
My kids are very good at reminding me to pay up. However, that's one very important detail I'm good at putting off. Your system is only as good as your willingness to be consistent at it. So, delegate areas that you are weak in to your spouse. If the whole family is involved in some way, you are more likely to be successful.

Model the right attitude
Lastly, it's important for us to model the right attitude about our chores. Being a mom involves a lot of thankless, unseen service to our families. I often remind myself of Jesus' words: "What you've done unto the least of these, you've done unto me." Matt 25:40. Somehow in God's amazing economy, our countless loads of laundry and endless meal preparation and upkeep of our homes are seen. They are seen by Him.

Our home routines and housekeeping are a long way off from what I would call being a "well-oiled machine." We are still working at it, and a lot of training still needs to be done; both for my kids and for me.

What are some of the things you're doing that are working in your house?

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Heaven's Heroes


Who do your kids want to be when they grow up? If you have sons, do they desire to be like Superman, saving the damsel in distress? If you have daughters, do they desire fame and beauty? None of these aspirations are wrong in an of themselves, but are they ultimate?

The Bible is full of stories and accounts of unlikely heros. Men who didn't fear the lion's den, the firey furnace or the executioners' stones. Women who hid spies, or mothers who hid their babes in baskets. Forgiven women who made radical acts of worship at the Savior's feet. We know and love these characters.

From time to time we all need stories that will rekindle our love and passion for Christ and for missions. Stories that ignite our spirits to live fully for Christ. We all need "heros" to look up to and emulate. For that reason, I commend for your reading, Heaven's Heroes by David Shibley. This devotional-like book introduces 22 ordinary men and women who do extraordinary things for missions and ultimately-the Kingdom.

Take for example: Eric Liddell. He was an athlete. But not just any athlete, he was an Olympic gold medalist runner. He left the fame and glory that was his in Scotland for the unreached people in China. In the village he was serving in, a man was sentenced to die by beheading. The executioner missed his mark and the man was left for dead. Liddell placed the man in a cart and pushed the man for 18 miles to the nearest hospital. The man's life was saved and he converted to Christ. I could see the wheels turning in my son's head as we read these amazing accounts, and he exclaimed, "I want to be like Eric Liddell, when I grow up!"

What makes a real hero? I submit it's not a latex suit and super-human powers. But a real hero is made by men and women, boys and girls who take God at His Word and live, and maybe even die for Him.

William Carey, missionary to India so aptly put it, "Attempt great things for God, expect great things from God." Get this book, be inspired and fall in love with some real heroes.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

We don't do Santa...

We don't do Santa or the Easter Bunny and I accidently spilled the beans on the Tooth Fairy. But a few years ago I came up with some new characters for Valentine's Day...the Lovebugs.

Maybe I did it out of guilt, or maybe I was just bored, but I wanted to create some of that childish wonder and imigination for my kids that I had as a child. We felt that for our household, Santa and the Easter Bunny both detracted from the ability to saturate Christmas and Easter with the gospel. So, I thought, "Why not take the historically-pagan "Tamus" day and turn it around for Christ?" Thus, the Lovebugs were born.

From February 1-14 mysterious little bugs sneak into our house, leave goodies and notes in the the children's mailboxes. Sometimes its a note, sometimes a joke or a riddle, sometimes there's a gift, sometimes there's not. And sometimes, the bugs get caught in the winter storm and are running a little late. (A.K.A. Mom forgot that it was February 1st and had to run to Target last minute.) But the message remains the same, the Lovebugs try to remind and point us back to the most amazing love during this season and every season-God's love for us through Jesus Christ.

The best part of the Lovebugs are some of the notes the kids leave behind. "What's your favorite color?" "Where do you live?" or my favorite, "I love you Lovebugs, we'll miss you!"

I've been surprised at how quickly and passionately the kids have latched on to the Lovebugs. My oldest is pushing 10 and she doesn't "seem" to suspect. Maybe she knows deep down, but fears that if she verbalizes her doubts the fun tradition might stop.

If you see any of my kids between now and Valentine's Day, help me keep the secret, and don't spill the beans!